Herpes

T(8:44:00 PM): did you have mono?

Y (8:44:10 PM): no, a girl at work did

Y (8:44:15 PM): she didn’t lose weight, btw

T (8:44:19 PM): oh thats right

Y (8:44:22 PM): she was just miserable

T (8:44:24 PM): damnit

Y (8:44:28 PM): lol

T (8:44:28 PM): i dont want it then

Y (8:44:36 PM): no, you want salmonilla

T (8:44:41 PM): yea, I dunno why the fuck I am tired as hell

Y (8:44:43 PM): THAT will make you lose weight

T (8:44:49 PM): ew 

Y (8:44:50 PM): could be herpes 

T (8:44:59 PM): i dont have herpes

Y (8:45:04 PM): lol 

T (8:45:11 PM): i thought I did for 10 years, but I dont! 

Y (8:45:15 PM): maybe it’s because you’re a full time working mother 

Y (8:45:20 PM): what! 

T (8:45:24 PM): you didnt know about that? 

T (8:45:25 PM): lol 

Y (8:45:27 PM): how could you “think” you had herpes 

T (8:45:29 PM): its a funny story 

Y (8:45:34 PM): oh, do tell 

T (8:46:04 PM): well, when i was with R, I got a sorish spot on my inside cooter part 

Y (8:46:11 PM): ouch 

T (8:46:30 PM): so I went to the dr and he said it was probably herpes 

T (8:46:37 PM): I think he might have done a swabby thing 

Y (8:46:41 PM): did he LOOK at it? 

T (8:46:41 PM): but that was that 

T (8:46:48 PM): i think he did 

Y (8:46:51 PM): ok… 

T (8:46:51 PM): I dont remember 

T (8:47:01 PM): so… I thought i had herpes 

Y (8:47:10 PM): ooh, let me guess…. foliculitus 

T (8:47:15 PM): it didn’t shock me, I was a whore in high school 

Y (8:47:19 PM): lol 

T (8:47:33 PM): it was frictionitis 

Y (8:47:37 PM): ah 

Y (8:47:38 PM): nice 

Y (8:47:44 PM): i thought i had warts 

Y (8:47:52 PM): i SCREAMED at C 

T(8:48:00 PM): I even told F when we got together that I had herpes 

Y (8:48:03 PM): it was basically a pimple 

Y (8:48:07 PM): you did not!

T (8:48:11 PM): yup 

Y (8:48:13 PM): omg 

Y (8:48:18 PM): that’s fucking classic 

T (8:48:29 PM): and then we had like this half a three some right in the beginning and that girl had herpes 

T (8:48:34 PM): but it really didnt go anywhere 

Y (8:48:36 PM): ack 

Y (8:48:56 PM): what, the herpes? 

Y (8:48:59 PM): do they jump? 

T (8:49:01 PM): he didnt screw her, it was just touchy feely 

Y(8:49:06 PM): gag 

Y (8:49:16 PM): herpes! 

T (8:49:18 PM): well, we figured it was just cementing the herpesness 

Y (8:49:25 PM): lol.  

T (8:49:36 PM): then when I got pregnant, it came up again 

Y (8:49:51 PM): omg, you didn’t know for THAT LONG! 

T (8:50:05 PM): because you know, if you DO have herpes they are things they do to the baby so that you don’t blind your baby with the herpes 

Y (8:50:06 PM): you’re a retard 

Y (8:50:14 PM): right 

T (8:50:21 PM): so I told my midwife that I had herpes, well, that I thought i had herpes 

Y (8:50:24 PM): herpes would blind me and i’m no baby 

Y (8:50:36 PM): and then, you got tested and all was well in cooterville? 

T (8:50:46 PM): and she was all like – how often do you have outbreaks 

T (8:50:50 PM): and I was like… whaddya mean 

T (8:50:52 PM): i dont  

Y (8:50:54 PM): lol, outbreaks, you say?

Y (8:50:59 PM): !!! 

Y (8:51:02 PM): you’re killing me 

Y (8:51:16 PM): one bump and you think you have herpes 

T (8:51:25 PM): so then since they were already drawing so much blood, they ran that one too

T (8:51:27 PM): and no herpes 

T (8:51:31 PM): I am a-ok 

T (8:51:37 PM): no herps for the F either 

T (8:51:40 PM): lol 

Y (8:51:47 PM): holy crap, you thought you were all diseased for so long 

Y (8:51:50 PM): that would suck 

T (8:51:53 PM): we both did 

T (8:51:54 PM): lol 

Y (8:52:09 PM): have i mentioned that std’s are my greatest, and i mean GREATEST fear? 

Y (8:52:16 PM): otherwise i would be such a whore 

T (8:52:24 PM): i even went so far as to call the boy before R and tell him to watch his junk for the herps 

Y (8:52:30 PM): lol 

T (8:52:37 PM): no, you haven’t 

Y (8:52:42 PM): yeah, it is 

T (8:52:46 PM): I mean, yea – they are very ew 

T (8:52:54 PM): and its not just like the clap these days 

Y (8:52:56 PM): i don’t know why, they just terrify me 

T (8:53:00 PM): you get like tripple decker hiv 

Y (8:53:08 PM): right 

Y (8:53:13 PM): and itching and burning and bumps.

Y (8:53:15 PM): ahhhh! 

T (8:53:48 PM): down in your lady bits 

Y (8:53:55 PM): AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

T (8:53:58 PM): hahaha 

Y (8:54:04 PM): so not funny 

T (8:54:11 PM): do you have any? 

T (8:54:17 PM): because I wont make fun of THAT one

 

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